Mischievous Days

Not long ago (about a week ago to be exact), the topic "what if you could turn back the hands of time? What would you change?" was brought up to me by a close friend of mine (I think you know who you are but I just hope no one reads this find out). It struck us all back then. Thinking of the times we wished it was really true, thinking how much we would have been better now if we had not did the things we did then.

I gave an answer that I wouldn’t change a thing saying that I happy with the things that are happening to me rite here rite now. Well, am I really happy? What if I didn’t do those things back then? What if I stayed and carried on? What if I fought harder for what I believed in? What if I said the things I really felt back then? What if?

Come on, face the fact. What if? What if? Those are merely feelings of regret. We all accepted the fact even if we don’t say it out loud that turn goes by. Slowly for some, fast for the others but never turning back around. Sure the clock may say 5 and then it is 4 again but it would only mean 4 on the next day not an hour back.

So? Do you have any regrets? Do you wish could turn the hands of time and defy the law of nature? Deep down everyone has their own skeletons locked up in their closet. Deep down everyone has their own secret. But believe me, turning back and changing things wouldn’t change who we are now what so ever. A mistake then just shows how much naive we were, how much inEXPERIENCE we were then.

I spelled EXPERIENCE in a capital words intentionally cause that is the main thing that I need to highlight here. Experience, may it be good or bad, keeps us alive. It keeps us wiser. My friend then said that he was happy he made those mistakes. He said, "Bro, I may not be the best man alive but I now know how not the be the worst guy in the future". Those words were so meaningful I have to write it down here.

What if I stayed on and fought for your hand? Countless nights I kept asking myself this question and were am I now? No where! It doesn’t mean a thing. It doesn’t change a single thing. But it is nice to dream rite. It is always fun to write your own fairy tale and be the champ in everything.

Of course no one loves losing. I still remember that penalty kick I could have saved back in school. The ball had already touched my fingers, just a bit more I said then. What if I did save that ball? Wouldn’t we moved on to the finals. Wouldn’t that pushed me own to play football seriously? Wouldn’t that make be as fit as I was then? Wouldn’t I be the man I was back then? Again ask ourselves, would you receive the great things you have now if you had changed back then? Questions left unanswered to me to this very day. Yet, I move on cause I know I have no time to write that fairy tale for my mind is needed here at this very second, at this very day.

Move on, stay strong and nothing will go wrong some say. But the fact that no one promises us anything a 100% shows how much experience they have. Nothing is predictable. Don’t worry if it is a 99% failure as long as you believe that there is still 1% left to cling upon.

Can we do something now and change the past? Can I write off history that was already made?

I think you bro for bringing up this topic for because of you I’ve realized how much I have gotten strong. I realize that dreams are things to look forward to in the future for my actions now would make a change.

Friends from that conversation then I wrote down three things I wanted to change. Then, I wrote another three things I am happy with now and I wished it stayed the same. I realize now, one thing lost yet, another thing I will gain. Please my friends pull yourself back up. Drag your feet back into this present life we walk today, Look back at the past a reminder and look back forward again for the past will never change. "What if"s will never happen. "What if"s will never change anything. Keep your head up and walk on. Please believe in yourself and you’ll see one day that nothing can stand in your way.

Yet again I managed to not hit the books and indulge myself once again in boredom. So once again without further explaining why this post is up here I present to you a lil bit of what I experienced or absorbed from others into this post.

Behind every man may sound a bit dramatic or exaggerated by many but lets just think for a minute and look this up a lil. The main reason why this topic came up is cause an old friend of mine just got married and I had just finished talking to my bud mainly giving an excuse of why I didn’t make it to his wedding (sorry bud, really forgot it was this week! I totally forgot about it) and congratulating him.

Over millions of times the topic of "dude, have you ever thought of gettin’ married young?" Well, first of we need to define young. My late grandpa got married at 18 and I thought that was young but sure those days it was more of a natural thing than it is "taboo" thing to talk about among us guys here. But believe it or not, four out of ten of my close friends are married by the age of 21-23! Thats like 40% and not to mention those were the guys who sad no to getting married young and were all about enjoying life first.

Believe me, being called "married young" is such a subjective word. A close friend of mine is already in his late 20s and his says he is as young as me. Yet, people still think he is still to young to bother about marriage. I personally believe that we should just be happy with our friends choices and support them in any way possible. It is not easy of course and having people talking behind your back is not helping either. So lets just do the talking here and think about it rather than mentioning names and say things we’ll regret.

The three main reasons why guys even do thing of settling down are simply these top three answers:
1) "Man, if I don’t get married now, I think she’ll be snapped up by another guy". Putting it simple, if you love someone that much and you know she is the one than just seal the deal. Another fact is that women naturally do get married earlier than men in terms of the puberty cycle aspect. Come on, I was always shorter than girls in my class before I was in high school. They mature way faster. It is a theory but still facts show women get married way younger than men.

2) "Dude, I am sure I am prepared and have my future well planned. I wanna get married now and I am sure I would be a great husband". Rarely heard especially from the guys in Malaysia here but sure heard of a lot from friends studying abroad.

3) Then there is the infamous "Dude, I’m gonna a dad soon and I am still in school!". Not the very best reasons but the numbers never lie. Lets not talk about it cause I think the education system should handle this topic instead.

What I have here are a few things of what a guy really truly seeks in their future wives ( 30% my thoughts anyway cause most of the answers were either pretty much the same or were to dumb to even mention or just not the kind of material I put up here rather than my personal blog anyway).
Not to say every guy has the same list but its a general thing and it suits most men.
1) Love - If you are just in love with someone it doesn’t really matter much what you say to convince him to stay in the League of Single Men. Your feelings cloud your head to think and your actions follows your control tower up there.

2) Understanding - We say it all the time but if I could find a girl as understanding as my close buds are heck I’ll marry her right here, right now! The point here is actually compatibility, interests and trust. All three combined and you will get that understanding. If we can never get that right than it sure is hard in the long run.

3) Able to control and know when not to - this is actually a personal thing but when I talk about it most of us agreed. I just find it hard to stay in a relationship long enough cause I know I am hard to handle at times and when someone does manage to tame me, she doesn’t know when to loosen-up her grip. It is impossible for to tell you every single time I leave home, go to the shops for a minute and then report back when I do get home if I’m doing it a lot in a single day. It is cool if it is a rare or a one off thing but sometimes you need to feel that freedom. That is way men tend to be "Bravehearts" and fight for our freedom. But, if you don’t have someone there to correct you when your wrong or stop you if you think it is for your own good that is just the same as not having someone next to you at all.

4) Caring - "Come on bro, behind all that thick stubborn head of yours, you gotta admit you just cannot not love being cared by her". Thats what they always say and yeah I admit they’re right on about that even if I never do admit it. Who doesn’t like the feeling of being appreciated and told how worried they are if anything goes wrong to you.

5) This is what I call the Mommy Syndrome. It is like this to most men. The first ever woman in our lives are mostly our mothers. Thus, this little bit of "my mom always does this" or "my mom likes to this for me" quotes always does pop up. The more you resemble a guys mom (not in terms of looks but more to her style or character), the more he is to like you more. It is strange true but it is a fact.

Mostly the other stuff are subjective to a specific person. For example, I would want someone who is near to me always while some might have other personal things then I do so it is just not worth mentioning since it is not about what I like but more of what the findings of my experiences with friends as a whole.

Sorry again for not being able to accept any requests or give out my personal blog to everyone. I do it mainly to maintain privacy and to be as free to let out what ever I want there without worrying that I might be hurting anyone I know. Cheers again and take care. Oh yeah, please do leave comments on what you think or any thoughts freely in any of my posts.

Adios