Mischievous Days

Visions Deceived.
I was a person who believed in truth not lies. I was a person who believed in hope and not lies. I was a person who believed in trust not lies. I was a person who believed in fate not lies. I was a person who believed in friendship not lies. I was a person who believed in deeds not lies.

I picked up myself even as life seems to reach its end. For I believed that there is always sanctuary for me. No matter where or when. I believed that I will change for the good I have done. I believed that my heart shall not lie. I believed that the sanctuary I relied on will protect me from my greatest weaknesses. Yet I was fooled to believe my heart. I was threatened to retreat and correct what was right in my heart.

A confused soul trapped in a wrecked body. My eyes shed at the sight of other Man’s glory. To prove innocence when nobody is here to believe me. How can they understand? How can they reach me? Will I survive my fight against a foe. I can not see. I can not hold. My visions were clouded by my heart and thoughts of peace and happiness in my so called sanctuary. My life seems to end with my heart no longer believing. I faced fear as if it was another step. I quickly picked myself up even though others are worried.

I fought my way till the end for what I believed in. I pledged my legions to my heart and sanctuary. Why God? Why did you take away my beliefs and my desperately clinging hope? What is it YOU are trying to show? I know YOU are the ONE and ONLY commander of earth and sky. The only ONE capable of showing truth behind all these lies. I ask the strength to carry me through my darkest hour. The strength to seek my Eden behind this long cloudy rainbow. May my will to believe burn again maybe not now but let it burn again. May my soul find the sanctuary I desperately need and scavenge to find in a place I’m scared to step. My visions return to choose what is right and what is wrong. I pray. I hope. I believe.

A dedication to the one that raised me. Papa. With all my heart. I love you.. You raised me up with your own two hands. You and mama mean the world to me. The one that taught me right and wrong.The one that showed me how to be strong. Forever I’ll be in your shadows of a great man.

Tears fill my eyes when I write this to you. Since the first day you sent my to school. Till the you sent me to prove my worth. For what you’ve done deserves more than a thank you. You carved me into what I am now. You showed me the light in a world I see so dark.

You gave me hope when the world came crashing. Behind that strong face. Lies a tender golden heart. The heart that cared for me. The heart that I respect so much. I still remember as a little child. Waiting for you as you came back from work. My idol then and now. I’m so proud that you are my dad.

Now I must walk this path I chose. Trying to emulate the dynasty of greatness you laid. With your blessings I’ll prove my worth. A simple task for you but a towering mountain for me. You made it in life. It shows. I see. So, I’ll work hard. To fill in your shoes. Bit by bit. Day by day. Step by step. Till it is complete. Happy Father’s Day! To my teachers who taught me about life along the way.

Shallow. Some say I’m shallow. Some say I’m a coward for what I have said before. Some belief I’m nowhere near my previous self.

Changes. Some planned. Some trotting and fall in together. Some plan to change. Some fail to plan. My heart still thinks of you like any other man would. You have shown me the strength of a woman.

The strength I do not possess. I’m jeolous yet proud of you and your strength. Thinkering my visions with your swaying steps. The "Grand Finale" of beauty peagants in my heart. There lies no shadow of a doubt. Your the one that reaches everytime my spirit shouts.

Howling at the moon like savage beast I may. A mere smile you give melts and puts my heart at bay. Yerning for more. Asking for a chance. My fair maiden you were, are and will always be the best!

Greed will be an issue for me but its no sin. Greed to conquer your smile will be my only will. That is all you do. Thinkering this boy’s sight. If I were blind now, I’ll die. I’ll die for no man can live with half a heart. For you my fair maiden had stole my precious heart. No longer mine but yours to keep locked deep within the eye of the beholder to guard.

Lies seem so real. Myths seem as if history was folk tale. For the truth is my feelings are kept apart. Apart from the "real world". Where princessess and stable boys are seen but kept apart. My world is but a chink of your timeless tale. My words are mere sentence compared to your sonnete. My end is but a death of bees when there time comes. Your’s? No death seems to suit you rite. As the Reaper will to melt with just one peek of your sight. The sheer beauty you possess lies no just within your looks. But the heart of gold only great kings ever stood. Most of all you will live enternaly. Death will only take your solid form. The real you? Kept in a place so special and sacred within the people and in my heart.

The meadows seem greener then usual. The birds chirpping a fine tune. With winds blowing the long green green grass. My babylon it seems. I set my eye gazing through HIS creation. The feeling of a thousand praises. Giving me hope that there is still life after death. Giving me another reason to prolong my breath.

As my feelings kept burried beneath my heart. My sighs seems endless in the past. Hope seems to be around the corner. My eyes still sore as I only dare. Dare to smile and spy from the dark corner of my heart.

Graceful winds filling my lungs once more. Pearcing my heart with fruits of passion. The spirit to keep on believing in HIM. That’s worth fighting. The strong will to carry on when know one seems to believe me. An eye for an eye. Maybe my past sins are now haunting. Its okay. I’m fine. The price I pay for once sinning.

I believe. I believe. I believe. The one strong will to carry on is my one thing worth fighting. Till death I will believe. Even as the Vultures circle around my vassel. My soul still lives on. Believing. Still carrying my hopes. My passion. My honour. My love. My deepest affection for the one I adore.

Life of a 21 year old child carrying a 12 year old soul. I’m such an infant. Lost and trapped but still clinging. Hoping and searching. For answers I try to seek. Thank you for believing I tell myself. As each step may scrape a chink out of my bleeding heart. I still believe there is still enough to carry me on. My will. My soul. My passion. My love. My burried sacred emotions. The thing worth fighting for. My BELIEFS!

When HE created my soul it was simple. The aim was to please. To please HIM, to please all and especially to you, and you, just you. This mission was hard but it was for you, and you, just you. The wind now sings a different tune. A lonely voyager on a ship to the unknown. As my soul heals the shame, my body heals the pain. For apart of me is taken away. The part that makes this heart tick. For YOU may have taken her from me. I know its for the best. I might not be the best man. For she was always the best for me.I know how being with the best feels. The warmth of love still heats me now. But the world is taking its place. Cooling the warmth you left for me. If Im a cold begger, would you come to restore the warmth? Cause im not complete, alone here without you. Gimme the chance to explain. To ask for forgivness. Dont shut the gates of heaven my angel. Im lost without a place to go. My visions were clouded cause emotions where running high. U know, the type u feel when a love one is saying goodbye. The feeling when a car drives away and u try to run to catch it. I know I cant erase what iv done so easily but believe me if I could, I’ll erase the world so only we can be together unharmed. But I have no power, nor do I have the power to get U to listen to this confession of mine. So some people will be reading this. I’ll be ashamed but who cares about that. I have no outlet to show my guilt, my sorrow and affection for u that i once had. If u dont even notice me and give me that chance.Now my angel has spread her wings. Leaving me to fend for myself ALONE. And I trust YOU. But Im no child who needs a happy ending. May it be bad or good this child will grow to learn. In being a man is a step we all must take the step to learn. 20 is just a figure if the experiences and good virtues are put to waste. Please GOD i pray to you, thanks for all the wonders YOU gave. I love YOU and trust in YOU. InsyaALLAH its all for the best.
- the lad-

I would be in a dark2 place. Shattered and torn-ed. No will to live. For I’m not strong. Wars I dare face. But my greatest fear is not defeat. It is YOU. Life without you. You whom I cannot protect.

I’m not strong when your no longer by my side. As sadness fills the air. My eyes blinded, dried as a dessert sand.

As the heart slowly stops. Hoping to meet you at the other side. Waiting at heavens gate. Why did you leave me? When you know your presence is great. Take the one thing 2 precious in my heart. For her I am breathing. For her I am believing.

If I were the one to leave? Sinmple as I am so little. Just but a name, she does not even know. My true feelings kept burried. Deep within my heart. On a stone my name writes. The date is unclear.If I leave first its okay. Please no one. Don’t cry. I leave with a great joy since you were by my side at sight. As I lay breathless in your arms. My last smile as a proof my life was complete. Thanks to youand only you. I’ll wait for you. With arms wide open. A smile at heavens’ gate. My life after death.

I’m sorry 4 da words. Im sorry 4 da sighs. Im sorry 4 da hiccups along da way. Im sorry 4 da laughs if it has hurt u even in disguise.

Im greatful 4 da times we spent. Da smiles n tears along a road that I cherish with my heart. This maybe da last time we spend together but it was a heck of a ride thats true. Da strength u gave me 2 face my fears I shall keep. Deep within my heart our smiles I shall keep.

I won’t say goodbye since our road will surely meet. Just a thank you and sorry for my mistakes on my knees I give. Da best of wishes and of luck, I know u all will make it. A promise of success, 4 u possess what it needs 2 make it.

In the dark lonely nights. No words can describe our feelings. From the deep dark labyrinth, small shaky steps, battered and torn apart. The stairways ever so lost from our sights in the myst of youth. A painting with no colours.
Lost and yerning for a touch of light. With tears of joy that floods the 7 seas. From a distance, the light touches these souls. Carrying us slowly towards our birth. Taking flight soaring in the skies we shall.
For the hand that touched us moved our souls. Towards greatness. May the skies be the limit. May strong winds and mountains we shall face. We will make it. In our hearts we were planted the seed of success. We thank you. Our love for them is eternal. Like the eternal flame they are. We love you! From the bottom of our hearts. Thank You!

Undoubtedly behind every great man is a great woman. Behind that gentle face lies a heart so soft and full of kindness. With elegant steps she graces through the tainted path I take. Pulling me back2 her warmth.

Behind does tears lies the heart that is strong as steel. Mountains turnt to valleys with just a smile from those lips of nectars sweet. With eyes that see through my once rotting heart. The eyes that only angel’s  possess. Pouring life into me once more. The strength to pick up a man thats down and beat. Tender hands that dare touch a mere moortal and lift my darkest fears.

The stern face of hopeeven though much has lost. The wings that blow me gently to my slumber. Dare not I doubt a woman’s strength. The strength to move mountains yet gently touch the burning souls of man to soothing winds. Let my last breath be with that woman.

Hehehe… Inspired by a certain person I know. Your The Best!!!

a lonely day without knowing,
great minds think alike,
great things without one coming,
great feelings i have unsung,
with this i present to u,
a heart that feels no other man can feel,
eyes that have dried after flooding the 7 seas,
a mouth that is sealed when words no longer carry a meaning,
just let be,
alone in the dark,
dark labyrinth,
without a touch of light for da soul..